Body Language Mistakes Men Make When Talking to Women
It’s so easy to make body language mistakes when dating. We’re seldom aware of our body language at the best of times, let alone with the added tension of engaging with someone we find attractive. I was taken aback to receive the following feedback from a dating coach about the body language mistakes I was making that undermined my attractiveness.
6. Too Cheerful?
“You’re smiling too much – it’s kind of creepy”.
Julia – Assistant Coach
This feedback from one of our assistant coaches took me by surprise. I was enjoying the role-play activity of making conversation with an attractive woman in a hypothetical social event, and my enthusiasm and excitement was manifesting in facial expressions that were at best distracting, and at worst appeared manic! I had never considered that smiling could be unattractive in a social context, but clearly my excitement at the feeling of mastering conversational skills of attraction was incongruent with the conversation itself, leading her to feel uneasy about my state of mind.
I consciously dialled things down a notch, calming my emotions and slowing my roll, maintaining a more neutral facial expression with the occasional intentional smirk or grin. Just this one subtle change made a huge difference not only to how I was perceived, but also to the sense of control I felt over the conversation and its direction.
I cannot overemphasise the value of a coach or mentor who can provide this type of feedback. You simply cannot get this perspective without the assistance of a supportive third party. If not a professional dating coach, seek out a female friend who you trust to provide frank and thorough feedback after observing you speaking with other women.